Funeral Pre-Planning FAQ: Steps, Prepaying and Your Rights

Funeral pre-planning means deciding what you want and writing it down ahead of time. It costs nothing, and it is separate from prepaying, which is a financial choice with more risks. The steps that help your family most are comparing prices, naming someone to carry out your wishes, putting your choices in writing, and telling your family where to find them.

What is pre-planning, and how is it different from prepaying?

Pre-planning is choosing and recording your wishes: burial or cremation, the kind of service, the funeral home, music and readings, and who should be told. Prepaying is paying for some or all of it in advance, through a contract with a funeral home, a trust or an insurance policy.

The Funeral Consumers Alliance (FCA) says you are usually better off planning without paying ahead, unless Medicaid requires you to spend down your assets. You can have a complete, written plan and never hand over any money.

Why plan ahead?

The FTC says that planning ahead lets you make deliberate decisions, avoid pressure on your family at a stressful time, compare prices without time limits, and start a conversation with your family. Families who have no written wishes often have to guess, and relatives can disagree about what the person would have wanted.

A plan also helps you control the details. You might prefer a simple cremation, a particular cemetery, a faith tradition, or a green option. The NFDA's 2025 Consumer Awareness and Preferences Report found that 61.4% of consumers were interested in exploring green funeral options, but availability depends on your state and what local providers offer.

What do you decide when you pre-plan?

• Burial, cremation or another option. See burial options, cremation vs traditional funeral and green burial.
• The kind of service. A funeral, memorial service, celebration of life, or no service. See funeral service types.
• The funeral home or provider, and whether you will want a viewing.
• Who will carry out your wishes. See the next section.
• Music, readings, faith leader and who to notify.
• How it will be paid for. See the prepaying section below.
• The information your family will need, such as your full legal name, date and place of birth, parents' names, Social Security number and military discharge papers if you served.

How to pre-plan, step by step

1. Think about what matters to you. Talk to your family about their expectations. Our guide on telling your family your funeral wishes can help start that talk.
2. Compare funeral homes. See the next section for your rights.
3. Write down your choices. A planner such as My Funeral Wishes gives you a structure for this.
4. Name a person to act for you. State laws set out who controls a person's funeral arrangements. New York, for example, puts a person named in a signed written instrument first, and California puts an agent under a health care power of attorney first. Many states let you name someone. Ask a funeral home or an attorney for your state's form. See appointing a funeral representative.
5. Decide how to pay. See below.
6. Share copies and say where the original is.
7. Review the plan every few years and after a move, marriage, divorce or death in the family.

How do you compare funeral homes?

The FTC Funeral Rule gives you rights that make comparison easier:

• Funeral homes must give you price information over the phone if you ask, and you don't have to give your name, address or phone number first.
• They must give you a General Price List (GPL) that is yours to keep. The list must include prices for direct cremation, immediate burial, transfer of remains, embalming, use of facilities and more.
• You can buy only the goods and services you want, and you are not required to buy a package.
• The funeral provider cannot refuse to handle a casket or urn you bought elsewhere, or charge you a fee to do so.
• After you make arrangements, the funeral home must give you a statement listing each item, its price and the total.

The FTC suggests comparing prices from at least two funeral homes. Calling a third gives you a wider range, and each should send you its GPL. Use our questions to ask a funeral director and funeral cost calculator to estimate a budget. The Funeral Rule also applies to pre-need arrangements, not only to arrangements made after a death.

Should you prepay for a funeral?

Prepaying can make sense for some people, but it has drawbacks. The FCA says there are serious drawbacks to prepaying that the seller may not mention. The FTC suggests asking these questions before you sign:

• What exactly are you buying: only merchandise, such as a casket and vault, or services too?
• What happens to the money you prepay, and to any interest it earns?
• Are you protected if the firm goes out of business?
• Can you cancel the contract and get a full refund?
• What happens if you move or die away from home?

State laws on prepaid plans vary widely. Some states require a share of the prepayment to go into a state-regulated trust or an insurance policy assigned to the funeral home. The FTC notes that protections vary widely and that some state laws offer little or no effective protection.

The FCA explains the difference between revocable trusts, which you can withdraw from, and irrevocable trusts, which can't be changed without the trustee's permission and are sometimes used when someone needs to qualify for Medicaid. It recommends not buying an irrevocable funeral trust "just in case" and waiting until you know you need one. Ask an elder law attorney about your state's rules.

A payable-on-death (POD) bank account is a simple alternative. The FCA says the money stays in your name and can be withdrawn at any time, though Medicaid counts it as an asset and the interest is taxable. See our guides to payable-on-death accounts, pre-paid funeral plans, funeral insurance and whether prepaid plans are worth it. If you consider insurance, ask how quickly it pays out, and our funeral insurance calculator can help you work out how much you might need.

Where should you keep your plan?

The FTC advises putting your preferences in writing, giving copies to family members and your attorney, and keeping a copy in a handy place. It warns against relying on a will, because a will often is not found or read until after the funeral. It also advises against a safe deposit box, because your family may have to make arrangements on a weekend or holiday before the box can be opened.

If you prepay, tell your family where the contract is and who holds the money, so the plan is used and nothing is paid for twice.

Can you change your plan or take it with you when you move?

A written plan can be changed at any time. Update it after major life changes.

A prepaid contract is different. The FTC says some prepaid plans can be transferred, but often at an added cost. Whether you can cancel and what you get back depend on the contract and your state, so read the terms before you sign and ask about portability. See transferring a prepaid plan and cancelling a prepaid plan.

What if you are a veteran?

If you served, you may be eligible for burial in a VA national cemetery. VA says burial includes a gravesite, opening and closing of the grave, perpetual care, a government headstone or marker, a burial flag and a Presidential Memorial Certificate at no cost to the family.

You can apply for a pre-need eligibility decision using VA Form 40-10007. A copy of your DD214 helps speed it up, but VA will try to find your records if you don't send one. The decision letter doesn't identify a specific cemetery or gravesite, because those can't be reserved in advance. See veterans' burial benefits.

What else should you organize?

A funeral plan is one piece of getting your affairs in order. Consider also:

• a will and an executor you have asked in advance, see what an executor does
• an advance directive and a power of attorney for health and money decisions
• a list of accounts, passwords and digital assets, see digital estate planning

Our family legacy binder gathers these documents in one place.

What to do next

1. Call two or three funeral homes and ask each for its General Price List.
2. Write down your choices, and name the person you want to act for you.
3. Decide whether to prepay, and if so ask the five questions above.
4. Give copies to your family and attorney, and tell them where the original is.