Funeral Music Planner

How to choose funeral music

Start with the person. If they left written wishes or told someone what they wanted, follow that. If not, think about the songs they played at home, in the car or at family gatherings, and the hymns or pieces tied to their faith or culture. A song they loved often works better than one that only sounds “right” for a funeral.

• Ask the officiant first if the service is in a place of worship. Some congregations have rules about which songs and lyrics they allow, and they may have an organist or choir.
• Read the lyrics. Some well-known songs have lines that land differently in a room full of mourners.
• Let more than one person pick. If family members disagree, give each person one moment of the service. It is an easy way to honor more than one voice.
• Match the tone to the room. Quiet music suits the prelude and committal. Lighter or more upbeat songs often suit the recessional.

Where music fits in a service

Services differ by faith, venue and family, so treat this as a common pattern rather than a rule. Our funeral service order template shows how the pieces fit together, and the funeral music guide has more on song choices.

Live music or recorded music

Both are common, and many services use both. Recorded music lets you play the exact version your loved one knew, and it usually costs less than hiring a performer. Live music from an organist, a soloist, a choir or a bagpiper adds a personal, ceremonial feel, but it needs booking and often a fee.

• Ask your place of worship or venue whether it has an organist or pianist and what they charge, if anything.
• If the funeral home arranges musicians for you, ask for the fee in writing. The FTC Funeral Rule says a funeral home must give you a written statement listing each item you choose and its price after you make arrangements.
• Consider live music for one featured moment and recorded tracks for the rest.

Before you finalize the list

1. Confirm the exact version of each song, including the artist, since many songs have several recordings.
2. Decide how the music will play: a streaming playlist, a phone, or files on a USB drive. Ask the venue what its sound system accepts.
3. Send the list to the funeral director, officiant and whoever runs the sound a few days ahead so the system can be tested.
4. Keep a backup copy of each track that does not depend on an internet connection.
5. If the service will be streamed or recorded, ask the venue or streaming platform about its rules for music before the day. Some platforms may mute or block audio they detect as copyrighted.

Planning your own service? Write your music choices down and tell your family where to find them. The funeral planning timeline shows when music needs to be settled.