Complete Guide to Viewing the Body: Tools, Checklists, and Essential Guides

The moment we lose a loved one, the world seems to tilt on its axis. In my work as a death doula, I have sat with hundreds of families navigating the complex, often overwhelming decisions that follow a passing. One of the most significant choices a family must make is whether to hold a viewing. This Complete Guide to Viewing the Body is designed to demystify this ancient ritual, providing you with the practical tools, emotional insights, and modern checklists necessary to make an informed decision that honors your loved one and supports your healing journey.

Viewing the deceased, often referred to as a visitation or "wake," serves as a physical bridge between the reality of life and the permanence of death. While the rise of direct cremation has changed the landscape of the funeral industry, the act of seeing the person one last time remains a foundational element of the mourning process for many cultures and individuals across the United States.

The Psychological Importance of a Body Viewing

For many, the idea of a viewing can feel daunting or even unnecessary. However, psychological research and funeral industry data consistently highlight the therapeutic benefits of this practice. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), 76% of funeral directors report that families who choose a viewing find it significantly helpful for accepting the reality of death.

Breaking Through Denial

Grief often begins with denial—a protective mechanism of the brain that refuses to process the magnitude of the loss. Seeing the body provides the "visual proof" the brain needs to transition from the "denial" phase into the "acceptance" phase. This is particularly vital in cases of sudden or unexpected death where the mind struggles to reconcile the person's absence.

Creating a Final Memory

A common concern is that the viewing will replace happy memories with a "static" one. In reality, a well-prepared viewing can provide a sense of peace. When a loved one has suffered through a long illness, seeing them in a state of rest—free from pain and medical equipment—can offer a restorative "final image" for the family.

Planning a Viewing: A Step-by-Step Checklist for Families

Preparation is the difference between a stressful event and a peaceful farewell. As an end-of-life consultant, I recommend families follow a structured approach to ensure the deceased is presented in a way that truly reflects their spirit.

1. The Reference Photo

Funeral cosmetologists are highly skilled, but they didn’t know your loved one personally.

• Recent Imagery: Provide a photo taken within the last five years.
• Detail-Oriented: If your loved one had a specific way of parting their hair or a signature lipstick shade, mention this explicitly.
• Digital or Physical: Most modern funeral homes accept high-resolution digital files via email.

2. Attire and Personal Items

Deciding what the person will wear is a deeply personal task.

• Full Clothing: This includes undergarments, socks/hosiery, and shoes.
• Style Choices: While suits and dresses are traditional, more families are opting for items that represent the person's life—a favorite sports jersey, a military uniform, or even casual "weekend" wear.
• Jewelry and Accessories: Clearly communicate if jewelry should remain with the deceased for burial/cremation or be returned to the family after the viewing.

3. Casket Mementos

The casket serves as a final vessel. Experts recommend placing small, meaningful items inside:

• Letters: Handwritten notes from grandchildren or friends.
• Hobbies: A deck of cards, a favorite book, or a small craft item.
• Photos: Copies of family photos (keep the originals for your records).

Modern Funeral Technology (2025–2026 Trends)

The funeral industry has seen more technological advancement in the last five years than in the previous fifty. By 2025, approximately 60% of funeral homes have adopted livestreaming as a standard service.

Virtual Viewings and Livestreaming

Tools like EventLive and OneRoom allow family members across the globe to participate in the visitation. This is not just a "webcam in the corner"; modern systems offer:

• Private, ad-free viewing links.
• High-definition audio and video.
• Digital guestbooks integrated into the stream.

Digital Memorial Integration

We are seeing a rise in the use of QR codes printed on memorial cards. When scanned by a visitor’s smartphone, these codes link to:

• Living Tributes: A digital page where guests can upload photos of the deceased in real-time during the viewing.
• Video Montages: A curated slideshow of the person's life.
• Charity Links: Direct access to donate to the deceased’s favorite causes.

Biometric Keepsakes

A trend gaining significant traction in 2025 is the use of biometric data. Services like Legacy Touch allow funeral directors to scan a fingerprint during the preparation phase. Families can later use this digital scan to create custom jewelry, such as pendants or rings, ensuring a physical connection to their loved one.

Navigating Costs and Logistics

The financial aspect of a viewing is a practical reality. According to 2023-2025 NFDA reports, the national median cost of a funeral with viewing and burial is approximately $8,300. For those choosing cremation, a viewing is still very common, with the median cost around $6,280.

Rental Caskets

Many believe that an open casket requires the purchase of a high-end, expensive casket. However, if cremation follows the viewing, you can opt for a Rental Casket. This is a high-quality wooden casket with a removable, combustible insert. The family pays a fraction of the cost, the viewing looks traditional, and the inner container is used for the cremation process.

Embalming Requirements

Is embalming legally required? Generally, no. However, many funeral homes require it for a public open-casket viewing to ensure sanitary conditions and a pleasant aesthetic for guests. If you wish to avoid embalming, you might explore Viewing Without Embalming (Options and Timeline) for private family moments.

Etiquette for Visitors and Guests

Attending a viewing can be uncomfortable if you don't know the "unwritten rules." Use this guide to navigate the room with grace.

The Approach

You are not required to walk up to the casket. If you feel uncomfortable, staying in the seating area or talking with the family is perfectly acceptable. If you do choose to approach:

• Duration: A brief 30-second to 1-minute moment of silence or prayer is standard.
• Physical Contact: It is okay to touch the deceased's hand or cheek, but avoid "hugging" or moving the body, as this can disturb the cosmetic preparation.

Condolences

The family is often exhausted and emotionally raw.

• Keep it brief: "I am so sorry for your loss; [Name] was a wonderful friend."
• Share a memory: If time allows, share a specific, positive story.
• The 15-Minute Rule: You do not need to stay for the entire multi-hour window. A stay of 15–30 minutes is standard and appreciated.

Special Considerations: Children and "Green" Viewings

Should Children Attend?

This is one of the most frequent questions I receive. Experts suggest children should be given a choice.

• Preparation: Explain exactly what they will see. Use honest language: "They will look like they are sleeping, but they aren't breathing, and their body will feel cool."
• The "Sleeping" Myth: Warning: Avoid telling children the person is "just sleeping." This can lead to a fear of bedtime or the dark. Use the words "dead" and "died" to ensure clarity.

Green and Natural Viewings

In line with the 2025 trend toward sustainability, "Natural Viewings" are on the rise. In these instances, the body is not embalmed but is instead kept cool with dry ice or specialized refrigeration. These viewings are often held in eco-friendly funeral spaces or even at home, focusing on a more organic, "life-centered" atmosphere.

Common Mistakes to Avoid

In my experience, a few common errors can add unnecessary stress to an already difficult time:

1. Forcing the Experience: The biggest mistake is forcing a family member to view the body. Grief is personal; for some, the "last memory" of the person alive is more therapeutic than the viewing.
2. Delaying the Reference Photo: Waiting until the last minute to provide a photo can lead to a presentation that doesn't "look like" the person, which can be jarring for visitors.
3. Assuming Costs: Many families skip viewings because they assume they can't afford a casket. Always ask about rental options or Open Casket vs Closed Casket (Differences, Typical Costs, and How to Choose) to find a budget-friendly path.
4. Misconceptions about Movement: There is a persistent myth that bodies sit up or speak during a viewing. While minor "gurgles" (gas escaping) can happen immediately after death, they do not occur once the body is prepared and presented by a funeral home.

Conclusion

Viewing the body is a deeply personal ritual that offers a unique opportunity for closure and reflection. Whether you choose a traditional open-casket service or a modern, technology-enhanced virtual viewing, the goal is the same: to honor a life lived and to begin the process of saying goodbye. By utilizing the tools and checklists provided in this guide, you can ensure that this final farewell is handled with the dignity, care, and clarity your loved one deserves.

As you navigate these choices, remember that there is no "right" way to grieve. Listen to your intuition, consult with professionals, and prioritize the emotional needs of yourself and your family.